Girls Be Careful

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1) What should a woman do if she finds herself alone in the company of a strange male as she prepares to enter a lift in a high-rise apartment late at night?

Experts Say: Enter the lift. If you need to reach the 13th floor, press all the buttons up to your destination. No one will dare attack you in a lift that stops on every floor.


2) What to do if a stranger tries to attack you when you are alone in your house, run into the kitchen.

Experts Say: You alone know where the chili powder and turmeric are kept.And where the knives and plates are. All these can be turned into deadly weapons. If nothing else, start throwing plates and utensils all over.

Let them break. Scream. Remember that noise is the greatest enemy of a molester. He does not want to be caught.

3} Taking an Auto or Taxi at Night.

Experts Say: Before getting into an auto at night, note down its registration number. Then use the mobile to call your family or friend and pass on the details to them in the language the driver understands .Even if no one answers your call, pretend you are in a conversation. The driver now knows someone has his details and he will be in serious trouble if anything goes wrong. He is now bound to take you home safe and sound. A potential attacker is now your de facto protector!

4}What if the driver turns into a street he is not supposed to - and you feel you are entering a danger zone?

Experts Say: Use the handle of your purse or your stole (dupatta) to wrap around his neck and pull him back. Within seconds, he will feel choked and helpless. In case you don’t have a purse or stole just pull him back by his collar. The top button of his shirt would then do the same trick.

5} If you are stalked at night.

Expert Say: enter a shop or a house and explain your predicament. If it is night and shops are not open, go inside an ATM box. ATM centers always have security guards. They are also monitored by close circuit television.
Fearing identification, no one will dare attack you.

After all, being mentally alert is the greatest weapon you can ever have.

Please spread it to all those women u care & spread awareness as dis is d least we can do for a social & moral cause and fr d safety of women.
Dr-Ihab Maher

The True Meaning of Discipline

Parents often forget that a child learns discipline by following his parents’ example.  An old Japanese proverb says that children learn by watching their mothers’ backs.  In other words, children do as their parents do.  If parents physically abuse their children, even in the name of discipline, then the children will learn the violence of physical abuse.  The children will suffer as the victims of physical abuse, probably without understanding the lesson behind the abuse.  This is especially true when parents spank even young babies under the age of one year.  What on earth does a young child learn from physical punishment except violence?

t appears that parents do not even conceive of the possibly that there is a cultural expectation that young children will misbehave and that parents will duly punish their unwieldy children.  As a result of cultural influences, parents are led to expect “the terrible twos,” and they are expected to use force to subdue their children.  For some reason, despite the barbarity of imposing physical punishment upon young and defenseless children, parents spank and hit their children. 

It is not clear to me why parents do not heed the inner revulsion that their consciences should be expressing?  Is it because our culture has become so accustomed to the norm of misunderstanding children and their behavior that parents’ consciences may no longer be stricken with pangs of doubt when they use corporal punishment?  Are parents so undisciplined that they can no longer see how wrong it is to hit another person, especially one who happens to be smaller and weaker?  Ultimately, it is ironic that undisciplined parents expect young children to become disciplined.

There are parents who will object to the idea that they are undisciplined, but self-control and restraint are integral aspects of discipline.  How does a parent who spanks or hits his or her child express either self-control or restraint?  Some child-rearing experts advise parent to cool off before spanking their young children.  I find this suggestion to be ludicrous since spanking achieves only one objective:  it advocates violence against children. 

In other words, some experts suggest beating a child after the parent has calmed down so that the child knows that the beating is for his good and not just the result of a parent’s anger.  Who actually believes that violence at any time is beneficial?  It is illogical and unconscionable that any sane parent would advocate corporal punishment at all. 

The key to understanding discipline is to comprehend the importance of satisfying a child’s needs.  Fulfillment of fundamental needs is a mandate in early childhood.  These needs are primarily the need to love and to be loved; the physical need for nourishment, comfort, warmth, and touch; the need to play and to work; the need to be close to one's mother; and the need for assurance.  All these needs and more are fulfilled by breastfeeding on demand. 

These needs can and should be fulfilled not only for the well-being of young children but also for their parents.  When young children are satisfied, the need for punitive measures to teach or enforce discipline is unnecessary.  Satisfied children will be disciplined, and that is the bottom line. 

Breastfeeding on demand is what has enabled human beings to survive, yet today's parents know very little about breastfeeding on demand.  This is a cultural deficiency that needs to be addressed post haste.  Breastfeeding is a non-punitive, pleasurable, and deeply life-fulfilling activity.  Every child and his parents deserve to experience the good that breastfeeding creates. 

The simplicity of breastfeeding on demand will ease many parents’ and children’s lives because the need for discipline becomes non-existent.  Discipline, as embodied so perfectly by the art of breastfeeding, is learned at the breast in a non-violent way through positive human interaction.  Life is meant to be enjoyable.  This is possible if more parents would offer their children the gift of prolonged breastfeeding on demand.

Les Brown is a top Motivational Speaker, Speech Coach, and Best-Selling Author, loving father and grandfather, whose passion is empowering youth and helping them have a larger vision for their lives. Les Brown's straight-from-the-heart, high-energy, passionate message motivates and engages all audiences to step into their greatness, providing them with the motivation to take the next step toward living their dream. Les Brown's charisma, warmth and sense of humor have impacted many lives. Les Brown's life itself is a true testament to the power of positive thinking and the infinite human potential. Leslie C. Brown was born on February 17, 1945, in an abandoned building on a floor in Liberty City, a low-income section of Miami, Florida, and adopted at six weeks of age by Mrs. Mamie Brown, a 38 year old single woman, cafeteria cook and domestic worker, who had very little education or financial means, but a very big heart and the desire to care for Les Brown and his twin brother, Wesley Brown. Les Brown calls himself "Mrs. Mamie Brown's Baby Boy" and claims "All that I am and all that I ever hoped to be, I owe to my mother".

In the fifth grade, Les Brown was mistakenly declared "educably mentally retarded" and placed back in the fourth grade and later failed the eight grade, due to his inattention to school work, his restless energy, and his teachers' failure to recognize his true potential. He was referred to as "D .T." for "Dumb Twin". The label and stigma severely damaged his self-esteem for many years. Mamie Brown's believe in her son's ability to achieve whatever he set his mind to achieving made a difference in his life. "Her strength and character are my greatest inspiration, always have been and always will be." Les Brown’s determination and persistence searching for ways to help Mamie Brown overcome poverty and his philosophy “do whatever it takes to achieve success” led him to become a distinguished authority on harnessing human potential and success. Les Brown's passion to learn and his hunger to realize greatness in himself and others helped him to achieve greatness in spite of not having formal education or training beyond high school. "My mission is to get a message out that will help people become uncomfortable with their mediocrity. A lot of people are content with their discontent. I want to be the catalyst that enables them to see themselves having more and achieving more." Les moved to Detroit and rented an office with an attorney, where he slept on the floor and welcomed his reality stating that he did not even want a blanket or pallet on the cold, hard floor to keep him motivated to strive. In 1986, Les entered the public speaking arena on a full-time basis and formed his own company, Les Brown Enterprises, Inc.. In 1989, Les Brown was the recipient of the National Speakers Association's highest honor: the Council of Peers Award of Excellence. In 1990, Les Brown recorded his first in a series of speech presentations for the Public Broadcasting System. In 1991, the program entitled "You Deserve" with Les Brown, was awarded a Chicago-area Emmy and became the leading fund-raising program of its kind for pledges to PBS stations nationwide. In 1992, he was selected as one of the year's Top Five Outstanding Speakers by members of Toastmasters International. He has also been honored at the International Convention of the National Speaker's Association with the organization's most prestigious award for excellence in the field of communication and leadership: The Golden Gavel. Les Brown rose from a hip-talking morning DJ to broadcast manager; from community activist to community leader; from political commentator to three-term State legislator in Ohio; and from a banquet and nightclub emcee to premier Keynote Speaker for audiences as big as 80,000 people, including Fortune 500 companies and organizations all over the world. As a caring and dedicated Speech Coach, Les Brown has coached and trained numerous successful young speakers all over the nation. Les Brown is also the author of the highly acclaimed and successful books, "Live Your Dreams" and "It's Not Over Until You Win", and former host of The Les Brown Show, a nationally syndicated daily television talk show which focused on solutions and not on problems.

Africa fashion, loud and widely exposed,
a propagation of style, beauty and fashion from an African perspective.

Trying out African fashion

“The most beautiful makeup of a woman is passion. But cosmetics are easier to buy.” 
― Yves Saint-Laurent
“Dress shabbily and they remember the dress; dress impeccably and they remember the woman.” 
― Coco Chanel
“I love new clothes. If everyone could just wear new clothes everyday, I reckon depression wouldn’t exist anymore.” 

Nigeria’s oldest twin sisters, Mrs Esther Taiwo Olukoya and Emily Kehinde Ogunde celebrated their 100th birthday together in Ijebu Ode, Ogun State on Wednesday the 13th of March.

The twins, who are also great grandmothers, are sisters of the town's late traditional ruler, Oba Aderibigbe Martins, the Olugbani of Okun Owa. The sisters who were both choristers at Saint Barnabas Church, Okun-Owa were joined in hearty celebration by residents and family from across the world.

The whole town bedecked in their Sunday best celebrated their special senior citizens' special day and centenary birthday yesterday, Saturday March 16 , 2013 at their country home in Okun-Owa.

They were traders as was the practice back in their time, but Kehinde, one of the wives of Late doyen of Nigerian theatre, Chief Hubert Ogunde, also assisted her husband in the theatre business working at the background. Mrs Ogunde's first husband was Mr OLUKOGA who died at an early age, making her to marry Chief Hubert Ogunde later in life.

At the holy communion service conducted by Venerable Oguntoye who was so enthusiastic that for the first time in his 30 years of evangelical work he was conducting a birthday service for not just a centenarian but for centenarian twins. During the service, the twins displayed their singing prowess, causing their guests to burst into a frenetic explosion of joy.

At a hundred years of age, the twins still have their complete dentition and Kehinde, the wife of late Chief Hubert Ogunde sprang to her feet when a delegation of Ogunde's children sang some of Ogunde's songs.

They were born exactly on March 13, 1913 at Okun Owa, Ijebu' Ogun State.

Mrs Esther Taiwo Olukoya and Mrs Emily Kehinde Ogunde who looked almost identical but for the fact that Taiwo is a little on the chubby side than Kehinde, may probably be the third set of twins in the world to hit the century age and perhaps the first in Africa.

Though Taiwo due to weak limbs uses the wheel chair, she still walked to her seat aided by children while Taiwo walks slowly unaided. Both were full of smiles as they cut their birthday cake

MORE ON MOTHERHOOD

1. You don't need to know everything. Do you remember those months before that first child came in your home? I do. I remember stacks of books I bought, internet - just thinking about that makes me wonder how on earth I did it - what did I do when I needed a quick recipe? A book? grin that I would devour, underline, and reference. What to expect the first day, week, year, and so on. And I had this other one - this portable pediatrician one - that I'd scour symptoms making sure that my baby was fine. And he was. In fact, he's almost 3 and survived those early months of me looking everything up and calling my mother and worrying. You know what? I didn't know so much, and we did okay. We muddled through, and I figured stuff out, and it's been okay. So I've learned that even if I don't know it all that I'll be okay. And, honestly, sometimes I'd like to know a bit less. We live in a data rich information saturated world and sometimes google search can just stay unopened.

     2. Listen first, speak second. My argument, my reasoning, and why I'm right seems to always play in my head when I'm talking with my kids. But, after these years of parenting I've truly begun to learn the value in listening first - hearing their point of view - and truly trying to understand before I end up speaking mine. It doesn't mean that they're always right, but rather is this sign of respect for the feelings of their hearts. So I've learned - listen, listen, listen, bite your tongue, listen, and listen. This skill? Applies to all of life and relationships. We can learn a great deal by listening to others and shelving our agenda for a bit. When we bless others with attentiveness we get a glimpse into their heart and their importance. Those things matter.

3. The agenda doesn't need to be set in stone. Even though you'd sometimes like it to be. Flexibility has been what I've learned - adapt, change, recalculate - and to not let the adaptations taint my mood for the day. Raising a family, having children, and just living life has truly emphasized me the idea of grace and flexibility. If you can learn to laugh, and to brush things off, then your day will go so much smoother. Just pick up where you can, press on, and use the remainder of your day well. Instead of looking where things didn't go right look to what did. And often some of the sweetest life lessons and moments come in those times where you went off schedule and tried something new.

4. Others may not agree, but you can still be respectful. Us mothers can work ourselves up in a tizzy about all the different things mothers debate. And all of these things - vaccinations, education, etc - are all good things. Needed things. Remember? It's good that we're not the same - that's beautiful. But here's the deal even if others don't agree with you or you don't agree with them there still needs to be a level of respect. I expect that from my kids when they don't agree with me or with their siblings. As women let's hold that bar high and respect each other even when we don't agree. Our children are watching.

5. Playing matters more than the dishes. There has been so many in a minutes and just a seconds in my life because I've wanted to get those dishes done. You know what? They always get done. Inevitably. But sometimes, playing, and getting on the floor or throwing that baseball in the backyard matters way more than the pile of dishes waiting to get done. I have had to discipline myself to say no to those things and time and yes to my children. They need us there doing life with them

6. Start saying yes. Several months ago I wrote a post called motherhood. My good friend Faith at 

church has been doing a series of pictures called Today I said Yes to... You know what? It's easier for me to say no. I'm being honest. When I say no most of the time it means less effort, less work from me. But I need to say yes. I never realized how often I said no until I had children. Now, now I've learned that I need to start saying yes before it may come to the point that they stop asking. What can you say yes to today?

7. Chores are good. Even though my children might tell you otherwise. From a young age we've expected chores around our home. Nothing excessive, but keeping your room tidy, making your bed, putting your clothes in the laundry. Our society needs kids that are taught the value in work, and that it is not always something that needs to have a dollar sign attached to it. Part of living in a family and in a home is working together to get it all done. So don't run from chores - incorporate them into your life. Now, the kids do get an allowance, but that is for specific chores outside of the general expected stewardship roles. Find the balance, but don't run from chores.

8. Optimism is worth it. Sometimes it's easier for me to be pessimistic and see all that doesn't work. But, when I do that I find myself scurrying around from thing to thing to thing. Optimism is worth it. It's an attitude, a heart adjustment, really. It's being willing to see the good before seeing the things that don't work. It's kind of like the listening before speaking bit - it's practice, but worth the effort. Optimism takes work and choosing to see the good, but living an optimistic life allows for many more finding joy loving the little things moments.

9. Choose {find} joy. It would be easy to sit and lament how hard everything was during the day. And you know what? Sometimes we simply need to do that. But do you know that it is also of utmost importance for our children to see us happy? Not all the time, but some of the time? Once a little one of mine asked me why I didn't smile much during the day. I didn't even realize that I had been so focused that I was kind of moving through my house like a bull in a china shop. I remember looking in his eyes and telling him that I was so happy to be his mmami and he told me then I needed to smile.Mothers, smile at your kids today. Tell them you love being their mmami even though inside it might have been a really hard day. Those words matter.

10. Tell your kids you like them. Remember how I said words matter? Well, let me tell you, make sure you tell your kids that you simply like them. Love is unconditional. Like is the word that tells them you like being around them, you like who they are, and that you simply like them as your child. my Ik the other night was resting in my bed and he said, mmami, I love you. Talk about melt my heart. Learn from that - take a minute and walk with your little one or your big one and let them know that you like them. Simple words, but very powerful heart words to cherish.

Ten secrets, ten facts, ten things I learned being a mother. Children are often the best teachers - their tenacity, zest for life, and unending curiosity inspires me to look at life through a different lens.